Lessons #247 and 248
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+ 1. It is best to use this note after you have listened to the lessons because there are +
+ comments given in the actual exposition not in the note. +
+ 2. The Bible abbreviations are as follows: CEV =Contemporary English version, +
+ CEB = Common English Bible, ESV= English Standard Version, +
+ GWT = God’s Word Translation, ISV = International Standard Version, +
+ NAB=New English Bible, NASB= New American Standard Bible, +
+ NEB= New English Bible, NET = New English Translation, +
+ NLT = New Living Translations NJB = New Jerusalem Bible, +
+ NJV = New Jewish Bible, TEV = Today’s English Version. +
+ 3. Notes have not been edited for grammatical errors. +
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Children-Parent responsibilities (Eph 6:1-4)
1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— 3 “that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” 4 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
The Holy Spirit through the Apostle Paul is concerned that those who call themselves Christians should live their lives in such a way as to reflect that they are indeed those who belong to the household of God in Christ. Thus, the apostle focused on the Christian household of the time he wrote this epistle. A typical household of the ancient people will consist of husband and wives, children, and perhaps slaves. We are certain the apostle is concerned with the Christian households because of the way he addressed those who are the recipients of his instruction beginning in Ephesians 5:22. In verse 22, he began in the Greek with a phrase that is simply rendered wives in the NIV as those who are the recipients of his instruction. When he finished addressing wives, without any sign post or connective between verses 24 and 25, the apostle changed the object of his instruction with a Greek phrase translated husbands in verse 25 of Ephesian 5. Likewise, as he concluded the instruction of the responsibilities of husbands and wives, without any connectives, he began the first verse of the sixth chapter with a Greek phrase rendered children in the NIV. When he ended his instruction concerning children and their parents, he began verse 5 of the sixth without any connective to verse 4 with a Greek phrase translated slaves. We contend that the apostle followed this approach because he considered these various individuals as being members of the same Christian household of the time of his epistle.
Be that as it may, if those that call themselves Christians should live the lifestyle that confirms what they believe then their domestic life should be guided by the word of God. For a person’s lifestyle to be guided by the word of God that individual must be knowledgeable of what the Scripture demands in a given situation. It is because of this truth that it is necessary for the Holy Spirit through the apostle to explain the responsibilities of believers in a Christian household that when fulfilled will be honoring to the Lord and will reflect their faith in Christ. To be orderly in his instruction to believers and in keeping with the concept of authority, the apostle first addressed the responsibilities of husbands and wives in a Christian marriage that he described in detail in Ephesians 5:22-33. Normally, we should expect a household to have children. Therefore, in the passage that we are about to consider, the apostle taught concerning the responsibilities of children and their parents in a Christian household. In effect, we are saying that the passage before us is concerned with the responsibilities of children and parents towards each other in any Christian home. Of course, the responsibilities the apostle gave in this passage are applicable to all humans for a smooth running of the society but his concern is with believers who should endeavor to distinguish themselves from their contemporaries who are unbelievers.
The passage before us is an important one because of the impact of compliance or non-compliance of it has both on individuals and on the society at large. Many children who are now adults are suffering in their lives because they did not comply with the instructions of this passage. We are saying that there are many adults whose lives are out of control in that they go from one sad experience to another. They go from one job to another either because they cannot keep a job or because when they think they should be promoted they are not and so in frustration they quit. They change marriage partners as they change their clothes. In short, they do not have stability in their lives. The instability in life of any person can be traced partially to lack of compliance to the passage we are studying. The instability may be due to the fact that children did not comply with the responsibilities given in our passage or because parents failed to carry out their own responsibilities towards their children. Either way, the result is that you have children who as adult are restless and their lives spinning out of control because either no one taught them the responsibilities laid out in the passage we are considering or because they flatly rejected them. We will have more to say later about the instability in the lives of adults as a result of non-compliance to the instructions of this passage when they were young. But for now, our introduction is aimed at bringing to your awareness the importance of the instructions of this passage so that you will pay close attention to them as we consider them because failure to do so has immediate impact on the life of those involved. In effect, since the instructions are given to those who are believers or those in household of believers, they are not so concerned with the matter of heaven or hell as they are concerned with the quality of life that a believer enjoys on this planet. So if you are concerned with having an enjoyable experience on this planet then if you are a child you need to pay close attention to what we are about to study. If you are a parent, you should also pay attention because if you fail to carry out your responsibilities you will live the rest of your life blaming yourself for not doing what you should have done when your children turn out to be horrible human beings or when their lives are such that they are in misery continuously. But you will not blame yourself if they turn out that way in spite of you doing your best to carry out your responsibilities towards them when they were under your roof. The point is that we have instructions that are meant for us to have enjoyable life on this planet.
In our consideration of the instructions of the Holy Spirit through the apostle regarding the responsibilities of husbands and wives in a Christian marriage, the apostle first instructed the wife before turning his attention to the husband. We explained the reason for that as having to do with the concept of authority where the one who is under authority is addressed before the one who exercise authority. In keeping with this pattern of the apostle, his first instruction in connection with children-parent relationship is to children and so the very first word children of verse 1 although the Greek reads the children.
The use of the definite article in the Greek to describe children is important in that the apostle probably wanted to ensure that there is no misunderstanding of the word “children” as he used it. He used it to describe the well-known or more familiar use of the word “children” as those who are the result of marriage between a man and a woman. You probably may say to yourself, is it not obvious that the word “children” here refers to the natural product of a man and a woman. Well, things are not always as clear cut as it seems, especially because of the Greek word used. So, let show you why the word “children” needs to be qualified. The reason is that the word “children” is translated from a Greek word (teknon) with several meanings. The word, no doubt, refers to a child as an offspring of human parents as the apostle used it in describing the children in a family that one parent is an unbeliever in 1 Corinthians 7:14:
For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
The Greek word can mean “descendants, posterity” as those who are descendants of a common ancestor as the word is used by Peter to describe the children of Israel as having a common ancestor in the promise he stated in Acts 2:39:
The promise is for you and your children and for all who are far off—for all whom the Lord our God will call.”
The Greek word can mean “a child” in the sense of someone that is dear to another without any genetic relations and without distinction in age. So, it is our Greek word that is used in Jesus’ address to the paralytic He healed recorded in Mark 2:5:
When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralytic, “Son, your sins are forgiven.”
The word “son” is more literally “child.” The use of “child” does not mean that the paralytic is a child in terms of age but it is a way Jesus described him as being dear. The Greek word can be used to describe a spiritual child in relation to an apostle or a teacher so Paul who is not biological father of Timothy could call him his child in 1 Corinthians 4:17:
For this reason I am sending to you Timothy, my son whom I love, who is faithful in the Lord. He will remind you of my way of life in Christ Jesus, which agrees with what I teach everywhere in every church.
The clause Timothy, my son whom I love, who is faithful in the Lord is more literally Timothy, who is my dear and faithful child in the Lord, so Timothy is a child of Paul in the spiritual sense that he led him to Christ and he is also his teacher. In the same fashion, the apostle used the Greek word to describe his spiritual relationship with the Corinthians since he called them his children in 1 Corinthians 4:14:
I am not writing this to shame you, but to warn you, as my dear children.
The Greek word when used in the plural could refer to members of a given congregation as it is used to describe members of the congregation that Apostle John described as children of the chosen lady in 2 John 1:
The elder, To the chosen lady and her children, whom I love in the truth—and not I only, but also all who know the truth—
The phrase her children refers to members of the congregation that meets in the house of a real person that the apostle simply addressed as the chosen lady. Of course, our concern is not with the phrase the chosen lady that has generated several interpretations. If you are interested in the various interpretations of the phrase, I suggest you listen to the first lesson of 2 John available on the church’s website. That aside, our concern is simply to convey that the word “children” can refer to members of a given congregation. The Greek word translated “children” in Ephesians 6:1 we are considering could also mean “child” in the sense of one who possess the characteristics of another being, as the word is used to describe true Christian women as children of Sarah in 1 Peter 3:6:
like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.
The sentence you are her daughters is literally you have become her children. The sentence does not mean that Christian women are children of Sarah in natural sense but those who obey their husbands demonstrate the same spiritual characteristics of Sarah when she obeyed her husband. Anyway, you see that our Greek word can mean “children” in various senses; so, it is not a trivial matter that we made the point that “children” as used in our passage of Ephesians 6:1 is to describe the offspring of marriage relationship between a husband and wife since it is possible to take “children” in a spiritual sense of those who are under teachers of the word or those who are members of a given local church. Of course, although the context suggests that we should understand “children” in the natural sense but there is also the fact that the apostle used a Greek phrase translated in the NIV as your parents in the Lord that we will examine at the appropriate time that raises the issue if the apostle meant natural parents or spiritual parents. Again, we will deal with that later but for now we take it that the apostle addressed children in the natural sense of the word so that we can examine the responsibility of children the apostle mentioned.
The responsibility of children in a Christian home is to obey their parents as in the instruction obey your parents. What does the apostle mean for children to obey their parents? This question is important because of the meanings attached to the Greek word (hypakouō) translated “obey” in our passage. It is a word that has a range of meanings. For example, the Greek word is used in the Septuagint with a range of meanings. It could mean to listen in the sense of consenting to someone’s advice as it is used for Abraham’s agreeing to Sarah’s advice of him having sexual relationship with her maid in Genesis 16:2:
so she said to Abram, “The Lord has kept me from having children. Go, sleep with my maidservant; perhaps I can build a family through her.” Abram agreed to what Sarai said.
The word “agreed” is more literally “listened” so that the translators of the Septuagint used our Greek word to have the meaning of “to listen.” Another meaning of our Greek word in the Septuagint is “to hear” in the sense of granting a person’s request, as it is used in the promise of the Lord to His covenant people in Isaiah 65:24:
Before they call I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear.
Our Greek word also has a range of meanings in the NT usage. The Greek word can mean “to answer a knock at the door” as the word is used to describe the response of the slave girl, Rhoda, who answered Peter’s knock at the door following his release from jail by an angel of the Lord, as the word is used in Acts 12:13:
Peter knocked at the outer entrance, and a servant girl named Rhoda came to answer the door.
The Greek word can mean “to accept”, as reflected in the translation of our Greek word by the translators of the NIV in Romans 10:16:
But not all the Israelites accepted the good news. For Isaiah says, “Lord, who has believed our message?”
The verbal phrase accepted the good news is literally obeyed the good news. A more common meaning of our Greek word is to follow instructions hence “to obey, to be subject to.” It is this meaning of our Greek word that is used to instruct the Thessalonians not to associate with those who would not follow the instruction of the Scripture as given to them through the Apostle Paul, as we read in 2 Thessalonians 3:14:
If anyone does not obey our instruction in this letter, take special note of him. Do not associate with him, in order that he may feel ashamed.
It is in this sense of to follow instruction that the Greek word is used in Ephesians 6:1. Nonetheless, because of the range of meanings of the Greek word then the instruction for children to obey their parents means that they first should listen attentively to what their parents tell them so they understand whatever is said to them. Then they should proceed to follow the instruction their parents have given them.
The instruction obey your parents should be understood within limit or we should say that it is to be qualified. This is because the word “children” has a range of meanings as we have examined. Any person whose parents are still alive is a child in terms of origin with respect to them but that does not mean that such a person is duty bound to follow the instructions of the parents as an adult. For one thing, marriage means that a man is no longer under parental authority and so is no longer required to obey the parents in the sense that he did while he was a child living with them. This, of course, does not mean that he will ever cease to respect the parents as we will note later but the matter of obeying them is something different. We say this because obedience requires total compliance to instruction and this does not apply when a man leaves home and so has come out of being under the parents’ authority to become the head of his household and he himself may have become a parent. We are stressing this point because there are some parents who misapply a passage such as the one we are studying to imply that their adult children who have left home are still obligated to obey them in everything they tell them to do. The context of applying the instruction we are considering is that of household. A child who is no longer a part of the parents’ household could not possibly come under the instruction we are considering. The point is that we should be clear to understand that there is limit to the instruction we are considering. It is not an indefinite command that binds a child to the parents regardless of whether they have left home or not. Once a child leaves home and is independent of the parents then the limitation of this instruction kicks in. Thus, the first limitation of this instruction is membership in a household. We are saying that the instruction applies as long as a child is a member of a household but that it ceases to apply in the same way of total compliance of parental instruction once a child leaves home.
Another limitation of the instruction to obey parents is the nature of their instruction. This means that although a child is duty bound to obey the parents but when the instruction from a parent is contrary to the truth of God’s word then a child who is a believer living in the household of the parents is not obligated to obey the parents. In other words, the same principle that governs the submission of the wife to a husband applies here. This means that a child who is a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ although still living under parental authority is also subjected to a higher authority than that of the parents. The higher authority, of course, is God. Therefore, when a parent instructs a child to act contrary to the truth of God’s word then the child has to obey God and not the parents. In effect, the same justification for a wife to disobey the husband under certain conditions apply here. We know that the Scripture contains several examples of those who defied human authority because a human authority demands something that conflicts with the word of God. The refusal of the apostles to obey human authority that demands them to stop preaching the gospel is a good illustration of the principle. Jewish leaders commanded the apostles not to preach the gospel of Jesus Christ, as we can gather from Acts 5:28:
“We gave you strict orders not to teach in this name,” he said. “Yet you have filled Jerusalem with your teaching and are determined to make us guilty of this man’s blood.”
The instruction of the Jewish authority runs contrary to the instruction of the Lord Jesus Christ to the disciples to preach the gospel everywhere. Therefore, they had a choice to obey the human authority so as to avert punishment or to disobey them in process of obeying Christ but be faced with suffering. There was no contest, the apostle chose to obey God and suffer. It is for this they had the reply recorded in Acts 5:29:
Peter and the other apostles replied: “We must obey God rather than men!
A believer who knows with certainty that the instruction from a lower authority conflicts with that of God must respond the same way the apostles did here. The implication is that children who are believers should not obey the instructions of parents that conflict with the word of God. However, when they do so they should be willing to accept the punishment that will come to them because they disobeyed their parents in favor of obedience to God. Such a punishment should be interpreted as part of what it means to suffer for righteousness since the Scripture promised suffering to believers who live righteously in Christ in 2 Timothy 3:12:
In fact, everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted,
So, if you suffer for living in obedience to God’s word then you should be happy about it as the apostles were when they were persecuted because of their faith in Christ, according to Acts 5:41:
The apostles left the Sanhedrin, rejoicing because they had been counted worthy of suffering disgrace for the Name.
Ordinarily, this second limitation should not apply with parents who are believers but there are children who are believers with unbelieving parents who may instruct them to do things contrary to God’s word; hence the necessity to state it.
In any case, it is our contention that the instruction obey your parents has limitation. That there is a limitation or qualification to this instruction is conveyed in the phrase in the Lord of Ephesians 6:1. There is a manuscript problem with this phrase in that several, early manuscripts and patristic quotations do not contain the phrase. It is uncertain whether the phrase was added by copyists based on the phrase as to the Lord of Ephesians 5:22 or that the phrase was deleted from several manuscripts in order to prevent the reader from supposing that the writer intended to limit or qualify the duty of obedience. But because of the weight of external evidence the phrase we are considering is included in the critical Greek text that we have.
Manuscript problem is not the only problem of the phrase in the Lord. There is also an interpretation problem related to the preposition “in.” The preposition “in” is translated from a Greek preposition with several meanings. It can be used as marker of close association within a limit and so means “in,” “under the control of,” “under the influence of,” “in close association with.” It can be used as a marker of circumstance or condition under which something takes place hence means “in view of”, “with respect to”, “as far as this is concerned.” Another meaning is as a marker of reason or cause so that it means “because of”, “on account of”. Another meaning is as a marker of manner in which something takes place and so means “with.” Still another meaning is as a marker of agency and so means “by, from.” This range of meanings is reflected when the phrase is used in connection with the word “Lord” as we will demonstrate.
The phrase in the Lord is one that the Apostle Paul uses frequently in his epistle with various interpretations or understanding. In some context, the phrase means to be in union with Christ. It is in this sense that the phrase is used by the apostle to indicate he is in union with Christ in Romans 14:14:
As one who is in the Lord Jesus, I am fully convinced that no food is unclean in itself. But if anyone regards something as unclean, then for him it is unclean.
The phrase in the Lord can be understood to mean that one belongs to the Lord as this is one way to understand it when the apostle used it in his letter of commendation of Phoebe to the Roman Christians in order to receive or welcome her as one who belongs to the Lord Jesus Christ in Romans 16:2:
I ask you to receive her in the Lord in a way worthy of the saints and to give her any help she may need from you, for she has been a great help to many people, including me.
In other contexts, the phrase in the Lord is one way to say that a person is a Christian. Let me provide some examples of this usage. The apostle in the greeting portion of his epistle to the Romans used the phrase as a reference to Christians, as we read in Romans 16:11:
Greet Herodion, my relative. Greet those in the household of Narcissus who are in the Lord.
The phrase in the Lord in this context, refers to being a Christian. This understanding is reflected by the translators of the GWT in that they rendered the instruction Greet those in the household of Narcissus who are in the Lord as Greet those Christians who belong to the family of Narcissus. The same understanding is reflected by the translators of the TEV since they translated the verse as: Greetings to Herodion, a fellow-Jew, and to the Christians in the family of Narcissus. Another passage where the apostle used the phrase in the Lord to mean a Christian is in his instruction of remarriage for a widow, as we read in 1 Corinthians 7:39:
A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.
The clause but he must belong to the Lord of the NIV is literally only in the Lord which is really a phrase that means a Christian. In effect, the widow could marry anyone she wishes who is a Christian or a believer in Christ. Still another passage where the apostle used the phrase in the Lord as a reference to a Christian is his encouragement of believers to continue to labor in the right way as they will be rewarded in 1 Corinthians 15:58:
Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.
The clause your labor in the Lord is not in vain, according to the UBS handbook, means “your work is not useless when you do it as Christians.” In another text, the phrase in the Lord means that the Lord is responsible for an action. It is in this sense that apostle used it as he defended his apostleship in 1 Corinthians 9:1:
Am I not free? Am I not an apostle? Have I not seen Jesus our Lord? Are you not the result of my work in the Lord?
According to the UBS hand book the phrase in the Lord means in this context “by the Lord working through me.”
Our consideration of the various samples of the use of the phrase in the Lord by the Apostle Paul indicates that it is a phrase that is primarily used for limiting someone or describing someone. So, the question is to determine how the apostle used it in our passage in the instruction Children, obey your parents in the Lord. There are several interpretations that have been offered with respect to the phrase. We will provide you three of these with observations of the problem we perceive with each before offering what we believe to be the interpretation in our passage. An interpretation is the phrase parents in the Lord could be understood as those who led the ones addressed to the Lord Jesus Christ as this kind of understanding will be in keeping with Paul’s use of the word “father” in 1 Corinthians 4:15:
Even though you have ten thousand guardians in Christ, you do not have many fathers, for in Christ Jesus I became your father through the gospel.
When the apostle writes the clause for in Christ Jesus I became your father through the gospel that is equivalent to saying he is the parent of the Corinthians in their Christian life. So, it is not that far-fetched to take the phrase parents in the Lord as parents in the Christian life. Nonetheless, the context where the husbands and wives have been addressed and where slaves were addressed suggests that the apostle had in mind a household of the ancient world. This being the case, it is a natural parent-child relationship that was in mind of the apostle so that this interpretation could not be what the apostle had in mind. Another interpretation is to take the phrase in the Lord as being the same as “as to the Lord” found in Ephesians 5:22 or “in the fear of Christ” as in the literal rendering of Ephesians 5:21. The problem with this view is that if that is what the apostle meant, he would have said so since he used the phrase “as to the Lord” in both Ephesians 5:22 and 6:5. So, we do not think that is what the apostle meant although its implication, is probably what the apostle meant as in the interpretation we will provide later. Still another interpretation is that the phrase has the meaning of the will of the Lord so that Paul’s emphasis is that when children give obedience to their parents, they are acting in the will of the Lord. This interpretation is appealing but the problem is the apostle rarely used the phrase in the Lord in that sense.
Having rejected these interpretations, how then should we understand the phrase in the Lord? There are two possibilities. It could mean “as Christians” or “because of the Lord.” This means the apostle instructs children to obey their parents as Christians or to obey them because of the Lord. In practice, there is no difference between the two interpretations since if children are to obey their parents because of the Lord that will suggest that the children are themselves Christians or at least belong to the community of believers.
In any case, it is probably better to understand the phrase in the Lord to means “as Christians.” As we mentioned previously, the implication would be that the children in view are Christians or children of Christian parents. We can understand this interpretation because it will not make sense for the apostle to give instruction to children who will not hear the epistle read. Therefore, the apostle must have assumed that the children he addressed would hear the instruction as the epistle is read to the congregation because they would be part of the congregation either as believers or unbelievers who accompany their parents to the meetings of the local congregations. Such expectation of the apostle is one that we are certain because of the instruction he gave to those in mixed marriages at that time. By mixed marriages, we mean where one is a believer and the other is an unbeliever. The Holy Spirit through the apostle encouraged such individuals not to divorce each other as their being together as husband and wife will enable them to expose their children to the truth, as we read in 1 Corinthians 7:13–14:
13 And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
For children to be said to be unclean, means that they are not within the bounds of the believing community to which one of the parents belonged while they are holy in the sense that they belong to the Christian community that a believing parent belongs. This, we can understand if we remember that the basic meaning of the Greek word (hagios) translated “holy” is “dedicated to God.” Children whose parents are Christians are dedicated to God in the sense that they are separated from the pagan community and are part of the Christian community. In effect, there is the implication that children accompany their parents to the meetings of the believing community regardless of whether they are believers are not. This being the case, such children would be expected to hear the reading of the content of this epistle so they would hear the instruction of the Holy Spirit through the apostle with respect to obeying their parents. The fact that children will be exposed to the point they would hear the epistle read is in keeping with examples of reading the law before the assembly of Israel that included children. Thus, in the time of Joshua the law was read before an audience that included children, as recorded in Joshua 8:35:
There was not a word of all that Moses had commanded that Joshua did not read to the whole assembly of Israel, including the women and children, and the aliens who lived among them.
This practice was also carried out in the time of the Ezra after the return of Jews from exile, as indicated in Nehemiah 8:3:
He read it aloud from daybreak till noon as he faced the square before the Water Gate in the presence of the men, women and others who could understand. And all the people listened attentively to the Book of the Law.
The clause others who could understand includes children who are able to understand so that we can say that children also heard the reading of the law. The point is that for children to hear the instruction of the Holy Spirit through the Apostle Paul with respect to obeying their parents who are presumed to be Christians, they must belong the same believing community of their parents. It is needless to instruct those who would not hear a given instruction. This means that the apostle could not have written the instruction to children to obey their parents if they were not present in the meetings of the Christian community to which their parents belonged to hear it. So, we are confident that the phrase in the Lord of Ephesians 6:1 should be understood to means “as Christians.” This will be in keeping with the predominant use of the phrase in the apostle’s epistle. Hence, children who are Christians are to obey their parents who in our context happen to be Christians,
Be that as it may, it is usually the case when the Holy Spirit gives instruction to believers that He provides justification for it. This pattern is evident in our passage of study since the apostle gave the justification for children to obey their parents. The justification for children obeying their parents is that that is their obligation or responsibility that is in conformity with God’s standard. This reason is given in the last clause of Ephesians 6:1 for this is right. The pronoun this refers to the command for children to obey their parents. When the apostle said it is right for children to obey their parents, he implies that children are obligated to obey their parents as that which conforms to God’s standard. They could not afford not to obey them. We say that the clause for this is right conveys the obligation of children to their parents because the word “right” of the NIV is translated from a Greek adjective (dikaios) that pertains to being in accordance with high standards of rectitude and so it can mean “upright” in the sense of conforming to laws of God and people. It is in this sense of conforming, specifically to the laws of God that the meaning “upright” is used to describe the parents of John the Baptist, Zechariah and Elizabeth, in Luke 1:6:
Both of them were upright in the sight of God, observing all the Lord’s commandments and regulations blamelessly.
The word can mean “just, righteous” when it is used to refer to God’s judgment of people and nations and so the Apostle Paul used it to describe God as a righteous judge that will award the crown of righteousness to him and all those who long for Second Coming of Jesus Christ, as stated in 2 Timothy 4:8:
Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.
The standard Greek English lexicon of Arndt, Danker, and Bauer indicates that when our Greek adjective is in the neuter gender, as it is in our passage, that it denotes that which is obligatory in view of certain requirements of justice and so may mean “right” as the word is used in Philippians 4:8:
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
It is because of this meaning of the Greek adjective that involves obligation that we stated that the reason children should obey their parents is that it is an obligation or responsibility they have that is in conformity to God’s standard. Of course, this responsibility is one that God approves or desires. This, we can understand because in a parallel passage where the apostle gave similar instruction to children to obey their parents, his justification is that such obedience pleases God, according to Colossians 3:20:
Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.
The command of this passage does not invalidate our assertion that there is limitation to the obedience of children to their parents simply because the apostle used the phrase in everything. The phrase should be understood in the context of Christian parents who will not require their children to do anything that is contrary to God’s word. In effect, the phrase in everything should be understood to mean everything that is conformity to truth of God’s word. Anyway, children who obey their children do that which is in accordance with God’s standard. Furthermore, such children will show that they are different from those who are under the control of the god of this Age, Satan, since being disobedient is one of the characteristics of those who reject God or evidence of Gentile depravity, as the apostle states in Romans 1:30:
slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents;
In addition, disobedience to parents is one of the characteristics of those who live in the last days, as stated in 2 Timothy 3:2:
People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy,
In any event, the obligatory responsibility of children as Christians towards their parents is to obey them. In effect, it is a Christian thing for children to obey their parents.