Lessons #205 and 206
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+ 1. It is best to use this note after you have listened to the lessons because there are +
+ comments given in the actual delivery not in the note. +
+ 2. The Bible abbreviations are as follows: CEV =Contemporary English version, +
+ CEB = Common English Bible, ESV= English Standard Version, +
+ GW = God’s Word Translation, ISV = International Standard Version, +
+ NAB=New English Bible, NASB= New American Standard Bible, +
+ NEB= New English Bible, NET = New English Translation, +
+ NLT = New Living Translations NJB = New Jerusalem Bible, +
+ NJV = New Jewish Bible, TEV = Today’s English Version. +
+AMP = Amplified Bible, UBS = United Bible Society +
+ 3. Notes have not been edited for grammatical errors. +
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Advice to the unmarried and widows (1 Cor 7:8-9)
8 Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. 9 But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
These two verses as they read in the NIV, and majority of our English versions are concerned with advice to those who are unmarried and widows. The advice causes problem because widows are unmarried, so a problem arises as to why they should be singled out. We will deal with this later. Meanwhile, this observation indicates that there is a problem in how to translate the Greek of the passage we are about to consider. Even before we consider the passage based on the Greek words used, consulting some English versions would indicate there is a problem with how to translate the Greek of this passage. Take for example, the sentence Now to the unmarried and the widows I say of the NIV is translated in the ISV as I say to those who are unmarried, especially to widows and in the CEV as Here is my advice for people who have never been married and for widows. Thus, by consulting English versions, we get the idea that there is a problem with how to translate the Greek passage we are about to study. We will deal with the problem of the translation of our passage at the appropriate time in our study. Meanwhile the two verses tell us that God cares about believers being controlled by the Holy Spirit that requires avoidance of sin. One of the things that keeps unmarried believer from being controlled by the Holy Spirit is continuous desire for sex.
Be that as it may, Apostle Paul filled of the Holy Spirit served to the Corinthians as long-distant pastor who cares about his congregation. A good pastor should be concerned with all kinds of believers in his local congregation by recognizing that there are believers who are in different spiritual status of growth and that there are those who face different kinds of problems. In effect, a good pastor ought to recognize that the sheep the Lord had made him overseer face different problems. This means that as he instructs them, he should endeavor to address specific problem of each category of believers in the congregation. He does this by faithfully teaching the Scripture verse by verse, word by word. We see this practice of addressing specific groups in the epistle of the apostle that the Holy Spirit directed him to write to a young pastor who was representing him in Crete. He instructed Titus to address different groups in the local church he was pastoring in accordance to their ages. Therefore, he was required to instruct older men, as in Titus 2:2:
Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.
Then, he was to instruct older women regarding their conduct and unique responsibility of training younger women in the congregation, as we read in Titus 2:3–4:
3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children,
Older men and women are usually not the only members of a local congregation and so the instruction was extended to the youth, according to Titus 2:6:
Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled.
In addressing the youth in the local church, the apostle addressed the various categories of believers that Titus was to instruct as members of the local church that he was to pastor for a period. It is not only through Apostle Paul that we find the Holy Spirit leading the writer of the Scripture to address different groups in a local church. We see this pattern with the addressing of the congregation that was the recipient of the first epistle of Apostle John because he instructed or addressed believers who were actually in different spiritual maturity although he used the words “fathers” and “young men” in1 John 2:14:
I write to you, fathers, because you have known him who is from the beginning. I write to you, young men, because you are strong, and the word of God lives in you, and you have overcome the evil one.
Thus, it is important that pastors should be aware of the different groups in the local church and their problems. To do so, pastors should endeavor to develop personal relationship with members of the local church that are presumably believers. Of course, the requirement to know members of the congregation personally is indeed an application of a literal declaration of the Holy Spirit recorded in Proverbs 27:23:
Be sure you know the condition of your flocks, give careful attention to your herds;
In the context of Proverbs, the instruction of this verse is directed to a shepherd who should pay attention to the flocks to ensure they are healthy, taking care of them for the economic reason that if he does, the flocks will benefit him. The benefit being given in terms of clothing, milk, and meat in Proverbs 27:26–27:
26the lambs will provide you with clothing, and the goats with the price of a field. 27You will have plenty of goats’ milk to feed you and your family and to nourish your servant girls.
Hence, the principle found here is that if the shepherd takes care of his flocks, they will in turn benefit or serve to meet his physical needs. The instruction although directed to a shepherd is applicable to pastors because they are the immediate shepherds of the believers as the sheep of God, as we may gather from 1 Peter 5:2:
Be shepherds of God’s flock that is under your care, serving as overseers—not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not greedy for money, but eager to serve;
If pastors pay attention to the spiritual life of their congregations, then they would in turn take care of their pastors as demanded of believers by the Lord of the church. That believers are expected to take care of their shepherd or pastor is stated in various passages of the Scripture but let me cite the question of Apostle Paul to the Corinthians that reveal this truth in 1 Corinthians 9:11:
If we have sown spiritual seed among you, is it too much if we reap a material harvest from you?
That aside, this approach of addressing the problems or instructing each category of believers in a local congregation is evident in the passage we are about to consider. This is because in the preceding section of 1 Corinthians 7:1-7, the apostle provided guidelines regarding the matter of sexual relationship before and after marriage. He taught that there should be no premarital sex and that those who are married should be engaged in regular sexual relationship except for a period when they mutually agree to devote time to spiritual exercises and then to resume their regular sexual relationship. This, he followed by stating his preference in the issue of sexual relationship and associated marriage issue which is to be single and exercise self-control on sexual matters. Of course, the apostle devoted more space dealing with those who are married and guidelines regarding sexual relationship between them so that it appears they were the only group in the local church in Corinth but that is not the case. Therefore, to indicate that he recognized that there are other members of the congregation with problems regarding sexual matters and related issue of marriage, he shifted his attention to address the other members of the congregation.
The shift to the problem of other believers in the congregation besides the married is introduced with the first word now that begins 1 Corinthians 7:8. The word “now” is translated from a Greek particle (de) that is used to connect one clause to another, either to express contrast or simple continuation. Although it is often translated “but” in the English when there is a perceived contrast between two clauses, but it has other meanings such as “then” or “and” or “that is” when it is used to link segments of a narrative. In our verse, it is used to relate what the apostle teaches here to what he taught in the preceding section so that we can even translated it in verse 8 with the phrase “as for” to convey that the apostle has now shifted his attention to another group in the local church that needs instruction or strong advice in this matter of marriage and by implication the issue of sexual relationship. The interpretation “as for” that although conveys a change in topic but it implies that the Corinthians asked question about unmarried and widows.
The advice of the apostle is directed to the group in the local church in Corinth described in the phrase to the unmarried and the widows. This is an interesting phrase that introduced one of the problems of interpretation of the passage before us. How is it interesting, you may ask? It is because in any congregation people can be classified as either married or single, but the apostle went a step further in his classification of those that are not married when he specifically mentioned widows. We will get to his mention of widows later but for now, let us note the problem of the word “unmarried.” Who does the apostle have in mind with the word? The answer is affected by the context and the meaning of the Greek word used.
The word “unmarried” refers to a group of individuals because we have a plural in the Greek indicating that it is not one person that is in view but several individuals who can be described as not being married. Anyway, the word “unmarried” is translated from a Greek word (agamos) that refers to unmarried man or woman regardless of whether the person has been married or not. It is used to refer to a man whether a bachelor or a widower. It could refer to a divorced woman as implied in 1 Corinthians 7:11:
But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.
It could also refer to a woman who has never been married and so could properly be described as a virgin, as implied in 1 Corinthians 7:34:
and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband.
The statement that the Greek word could refer to a virgin depends on whether the Greek conjunction used could be translated as “or” in the NIV or not. Thus, this second use of the word to refer to a virgin is uncertain. The unmarried the apostle addressed in our passage of 1 Corinthians 7:8 would include those who have never been married and those have been married but are no longer married because of the undesirable problem of divorce. The Holy Spirit would have meant for us to understand that the unmarried also included widowers. It is interesting to note that the Scripture does not say anything about widowers. Thus, there is no Hebrew or Greek word that strictly refers to a widower. The closest use of a Hebrew word to describe a widower is in a figurative sense for Israel, as we may gather from Jeremiah 51:5:
For Israel and Judah have not been forsaken by their God, the LORD Almighty, though their land is full of guilt before the Holy One of Israel.
The clause For Israel and Judah have not been forsaken by their God is literally For neither Israel nor Judah is a widower from their God because a Hebrew adjective (ʾǎlmān) that appears only here in OT Scripture is used and it means “widower,” in the sense of being forsaken by a marital partner because of death. The Septuagint translated the Hebrew word using a Greek verb (chēreuō) that means “to be widowed” or “to be deprived” or “to be forsaken.” It should not surprise us that the Scripture says nothing about a widower since a widower is never what a widow is, as we will note when we consider the word. Despite this fact, some contend that the best meaning of the word in our passage of 1 Corinthians 7:8 is “widower” as suggested in the foot note of the 2011 edition of the NIV of the passage we are considering. A justification for this position is that the Greek word for “widower” was seldom used. This justification indeed argues against such interpretation here. Another justification is that throughout the chapter Paul discusses situations involving men and women in “mutuality.” Since the word can also refer to unmarried woman as we noted in 1 Corinthians 7:11, there is no evidence to suggest that the word should be interpreted exclusively as a reference to a “widower.” The reality is that the apostle is ambiguous in his use of the Greek word in 1 Corinthians 7:8. The argument that to take the word as a reference to unmarried in general seems to be repeating what the apostle said in the previous section is not a strong one since in the previous section, the focus was on the married as we stated previously. Therefore, we are on a firmer ground to state that when the apostle used the word unmarried, he would have had in mind those who have never been married, those single due to the unpleasant event of divorce, and widowers because he singled out those who are single due to death of a male spouse when he used the word widows.
The apostle indeed singled out widows for emphasis. This truth is conveyed in the conjunction “and” in the phrase of 1 Corinthians 7:8 to the unmarried and the widows. Although the Greek conjunction (kai) used may be translated “and” but it has other usages. For example, it may be translated “and so” to introduce a result that comes from what precedes it. The word may be used for emphasis. It is in this sense that it is used in our passage. Therefore, I agree with the ISV and GW that used the word “especially” to translate the conjunction. The point is that the apostle singled out widows to emphasize.
Why did the apostle singled out the widows separate from that of all the unmarried, one wonders? It is probably because widows belong to a special class that are considered helpless or vulnerable. A woman is widowed not by her choice or any action that she takes unlike a woman who is divorced that in some way has a part in the divorce. We believe that it is because of the helpless state of widows that they are distinguished from the other unmarried. Widowers are not considered helpless or weak in any society as widows. Therefore, there is nothing in the Scripture that deals with widowers. Instead, we have amply facts and instructions in the Scripture that speak to the helplessness or vulnerability of the widows in any society. It is because widows were considered vulnerable that God is directly stated to be their defender along with the orphans, as we read in Psalm 68:5:
A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling.
It is because widows are vulnerable that we have several instructions in the Scripture that are intended to protect them. They are not to be exploited, as stated in Exodus 22:22:
“Do not take advantage of a widow or an orphan.
Anyone who exploits them runs the risk of judgment from God that may lead to his own death as implied in Exodus 22:23–24:
23 If you do and they cry out to me, I will certainly hear their cry. 24 My anger will be aroused, and I will kill you with the sword; your wives will become widows and your children fatherless.
It is because of their vulnerability that believers are exhorted to plead their case against those who have authority or when they are mistreated, as stated in Isaiah 1:17:
learn to do right! Seek justice, encourage the oppressed. Defend the cause of the fatherless, plead the case of the widow.
The vulnerable state of widows is one of the reasons we have several instructions in the Scripture of how to deal with them. For example, in the OT, their clothes were never to be held in pledge of a loan, as we read in Deuteronomy 24:17:
Do not deprive the alien or the fatherless of justice, or take the cloak of the widow as a pledge.
Their needs are to be provided by the people of God they belong. This we see first in the instructions given to Israel in the law. Farmers were to leave a portion of their crop for them to harvest, as we read in Deuteronomy 24:19:
When you are harvesting in your field and you overlook a sheaf, do not go back to get it. Leave it for the alien, the fatherless and the widow, so that the LORD your God may bless you in all the work of your hands.
In keeping with this provision, in the law, they were to be recipients of special tithe offered every three years, as we read in Deuteronomy 26:12:
When you have finished setting aside a tenth of all your produce in the third year, the year of the tithe, you shall give it to the Levite, the alien, the fatherless and the widow, so that they may eat in your towns and be satisfied.
When we come to the NT, we find that there is special instruction to the church of Christ to take care of those that are truly considered widows, as we read in 1 Timothy 5:3–5:
3 Give proper recognition to those widows who are really in need. 4 But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God. 5 The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God and continues night and day to pray and to ask God for help.
The widows the church should take special care of, as we stated, are those who are truly needy as indicated by them not having anyone to help them in that they have no immediate family members who can help them. When that is the case, the church should step in and provide regular support to such individuals that meet the criteria stipulated in 1 Timothy 5:9:
No widow may be put on the list of widows unless she is over sixty, has been faithful to her husband,
Helping widows is important demonstration of one’s faith so that we have the declaration of the Holy Spirit through James in James 1:27:
Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.
In any event, it is because of the special status of widows in society at large and in the local church in particular that we believe the Holy Spirit separated them from all the other unmarried people that may be in a local church. By the “other unmarried people,” we mean those who have never been married or those divorced or widowers as they are part of those the apostle offered the advice that is given in the passage of 1 Corinthians 7:8-9 that we are considering.
The apostle wanted to emphasize that he was offering advice to those identified as unmarried and widows because of the statement I say. It may not appear in the English that the apostle in using the statement I say wanted to emphasize the advice he was about to offer and its recipients, but the Greek enables us to make this kind of statement. It is true that the Greek does not have a technical order of placement of words in the sentence, as we do in the English where we begin with the subject followed by the predicate; nevertheless, it is not normal for a Greek sentence to begin with a verb unless the writer wants to emphasize the verb. This is the case in our passage because the Greek word translated, I say is the first word in the Greek of verse 8. It is for this reason we stated that the apostle intended to emphasize what he was about to say as important.
Th advice the apostle offered is that it is beneficial or advantageous for the single individuals and widows if they continued in their current status of being unmarried as in the sentence It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. The apostle must have been carried away with excitement as he offered the advice because the apostle did not use the word “is” in the Greek since literally the Greek reads good to them if they remain as also I. The literal translation indicates that we have a condition-based benefit or advantage. Thus, the apostle was concerned with the benefits or advantages of continuing to be single. We use the word “benefit” or “advantage” in describing the advice the apostle offered in the sentence we are considering because the word “good” is translated from a Greek adjective (kalos) that means “good” of moral quality. Thus, it could have the sense of “praiseworthy” as that is the sense the Lord used it to describe the woman that anointed Him with perfume prior to His death on the cross that the disciples were furious about, as we read in Matthew 26:10:
Aware of this, Jesus said to them, “Why are you bothering this woman? She has done a beautiful thing to me.
The phrase a beautiful thing may be understood as “praiseworthy deed” or “good deed.” The word may mean “right” as in the instruction of the Holy Spirit through Apostle Paul in Romans 12:17:
Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody.
The word may mean “desirable” or “advantageous” as in the apostle’s advice for those who are single to remain that way because of the situation of things in Corinth at the time of his epistle to them, as indicated in 1 Corinthians 7:26:
Because of the present crisis, I think that it is good for you to remain as you are.
The word may mean “excellent” as it is used to describe the standing of a deacon who serves faithfully in 1 Timothy 3:13:
Those who have served well gain an excellent standing and great assurance in their faith in Christ Jesus.
Considering the range of meanings of the Greek word, in our passage of 1 Corinthians 7:8, it is used in the sense of “beneficial” or “advantageous.”
How is it advantageous or beneficial to continue in the single state? The apostle did not immediately give the answer, but he did later within the context of the seventh chapter. There are two related advantages the apostle mentioned. The first is that in time of crisis one would not be bogged down with being concerned with a spouse. The second is that of devotion to the Lord. Those who are single are in a better position to be devoted to the Lord than those who are married. Both advantages the apostle mentioned later in 1 Corinthians 7:32–35:
32 I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord. 33 But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife— 34 and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. 35 I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.
We will expound on this passage at the appropriate time (God willing) but suffice to say that when the apostle stated that it was advantageous or beneficial to continue in a single state for those who are in that stated, he was thinking of not being overly concerned with another person in time of crisis and the ability to be devoted to spiritual things.
Those the apostle offered a conditional advice of remaining single because of its benefits are already single so that he meant that the benefits would be theirs if they continued in the state they were. This means that the word “stay” is better understood to mean “to remain.” You see, the word “stay” is translated from a Greek verb (menō) that may mean “to stay” in a place as Apostle Paul used it to inform Timothy concerning the whereabouts of one of his team members, Erastus, as recorded in 2 Timothy 4:20:
Erastus stayed in Corinth, and I left Trophimus sick in Miletus.
The word may mean “to continue” in the sense of someone who does not leave a certain realm or sphere as the word is used in the encouragement of Apostle Paul to Timothy to remain faithful to the doctrines he learned from him, as we read in 2 Timothy 3:14:
But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it,
The word may mean “to remain” as it is used of a person continuing in a given state as the word is used in the instruction of the Holy Spirit through Apostle Paul of believers remaining in the status or state they were when they were saved as we read in 1 Corinthians 7:20:
Each one should remain in the situation which he was in when God called him.
It is in the sense of “to remain” in a state one is that the word is used in our passage of 1 Corinthians 7:8. As we stated previously, those the apostle advised were already in the state of being single, so the apostle tells them that it is beneficial for them to remain in that state.
It is because those the apostle offered his advice were in a single state that the translators of the NIV added the word “unmarried” in the sentence of 1 Corinthians 7:8 unmarried, as I am since the literal Greek reads as also I. The literal Greek may be understood to mean that the Apostle was unmarried in the sense he has never been married or he is unmarried as one who is widowed. Of course, the traditional practice of rabbis being married lead some to conclude that the apostle was either widowed or separated from his wife. This may be true, but we do not have any confirmation of this fact. However, what we know for certain is that he was unmarried during his ministry as an apostle of Jesus Christ since he referenced to his being single also in 1 Corinthians 9:5:
Don’t we have the right to take a believing wife along with us, as do the other apostles and the Lord’s brothers and Cephas?
Thus, when the apostle wrote as I am or literally as also I in 1 Corinthians 7:8, we should understand him to mean he was unmarried so that his advice to those addressed was to remain unmarried as he himself was because he has never been married or he was widowed or separated from his wife, this later situation is very unlikely considering the instruction of the apostle later in this epistle. By the way, it is not a strong argument to say that the apostle was once married and widowed because he was a rabbi. It is the same kind of argument that some use to assert that Jesus was also married while on the planet. Such assumptions ignore that God is in control of things so that He directs human affairs the way He wants to accomplish His plan. It has been God’s plan from eternity that Paul would serve as an apostle to the Gentiles so that being married would cause problem for him. Therefore, it is likely that God worked in Paul in such a way that even as a rabbi, he did not marry because of what lied ahead of him. It is not difficult to understand that God could have prevented Paul from marrying in keeping with His plan for him. Paul was not a prophet prior to his conversion so that God would have used events to communicate to him regarding being single. In effect, He would not have communicated to him as He did to Prophet Jeremiah that He ordered directly not to marry as we read Jeremiah 16:2:
“You must not marry and have sons or daughters in this place.”
Of course, it is also possible that Paul was widowed prior to his conversion so that God communicated through event to him while still a rabbi that he needs to be single from that time until the time he would be appointed an apostle. If that was the case, his state would have been similar to God’s communication to Prophet Ezekiel regarding the death of his wife, as stated in Ezekiel 24:15–18:
15 The word of the LORD came to me: 16 “Son of man, with one blow I am about to take away from you the delight of your eyes. Yet do not lament or weep or shed any tears. 17 Groan quietly; do not mourn for the dead. Keep your turban fastened and your sandals on your feet; do not cover the lower part of your face or eat the customary food of mourners.” 18 So I spoke to the people in the morning, and in the evening my wife died. The next morning I did as I had been commanded.
Truly, we cannot be certain of how Paul came to be single. The only thing that is important is that he was single throughout his ministry as an apostle to the Gentiles.
There is no doubt that being unmarried is beneficial in that a believer in that state would not be distracted by things of this world in the sense of being concerned with taking care of a family. Furthermore, it is beneficial on a spiritual level of having more time to be devoted to spiritual matters but there is a downside that has to do with sexual desire. It is the recognition of this reality that the Holy Spirit put forth through the apostle in verse 9 beginning with the conjunction but that is translated from the same Greek particle translated “now” at the beginning of verse 8. However, in this second usage, it is used to state a contrast between what is said in verse 8 and what is stated in verse 9.
Sexual desire may cause great difficulty for those who are unmarried as that is what the apostle conveyed in the first conditional clause of 1 Corinthians 7:9 if they cannot control themselves. The expression “control themselves” is translated from a Greek verb (egkrateuomai) that means “to control oneself,” being used especially for sexual continence. It is in the sense of “to exercise self-control” that Apostle Paul used it in athletics arena in 1 Corinthians 9:25:
Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.
The clause Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training is literally everyone who competes exercises self-control in all things. Thus, the word is concerned with being able to control something that is either stated or implied. In 1 Corinthians 7:9, the implied object of control is sexual desire. The Greek implies that a person is constantly not able to control self when it comes to sexual desire. It does not mean that a person is involved in sexual sin in a physical realm but there is the implication of sexual sin that involves thinking of sex. We are saying that the believer the apostle is concerned with is not involved in sexual immorality in a physical sense, but the person is constantly thinking about sex as will be evident in the last clause of the verse we are considering. Meanwhile, we assert that because the Greek of the word translated “control themselves” is in the present tense that the implication is that there are believers who are single that are constantly pre-occupied with sexual desire. We do not mean that all people who are unmarried are in the same state but that there are some who are not able to avoid being constantly occupied with the thought of sex. It is this recognition that is expressed in the conditional clause of 1 Corinthians 7:9 if they cannot control themselves.
The advice of the Holy Spirit through Apostle Paul to those who are single but have problem with pre-occupation with sexual desire is that they should marry as stated in 1 Corinthians 7:9 they should marry. Literally the Greek reads let them marry. Thus, those who could not control their sexual desires are commanded to marry. The Greek uses what is known as aorist tense so that in this particular context, the command has the sense of urgency. In effect, there is the sense that such individuals should marry as soon as possible. In saying this, we should remember that the command is not a blanket command to marry whether a person could afford to do so or not. As we have stated in the past, a man is only ready to marry when he can support a wife and subsequent children that would result from the marriage. If a person meets this condition, then the command to marry requires that such a man should see marriage as an urgent event to pursue. A woman is at a disadvantage in this situation because even if she wants to be married, she had to wait until a man proposes to her regarding marriage. However, when such happens, and the lady has ascertained that the potential suitor is a believer and is God’s will for her, then she should not delay in marrying the individual. It is lack of trusting the Lord that causes believers to get involved in the unbiblical practice of dating.
Why is there a sense of urgency in the command issued to those believers who are not able to control themselves regarding sexual desires? It is because of the damage that constant occupation with desire for sex can cause a believer as we read in the last clause of 1 Corinthians 7:9 for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. The expression “burn with passion” is translated from a Greek word (pyroō) that means “to burn” in the literal sense of causing to be on fire as it is used of God’s coming judgment described in 2 Peter 3:12:
as you look forward to the day of God and speed its coming. That day will bring about the destruction of the heavens by fire, and the elements will melt in the heat.
The phrase the destruction of the heavens by fire is more literally the heavens will be destroyed by being burned up. Figuratively, the word may mean “to be inflamed with indignation” as that is the sense in which Apostle Paul used it to describe his reaction to those who sin in 2 Corinthians 11:29:
Who is weak, and I do not feel weak? Who is led into sin, and I do not inwardly burn?
Because the word means “to burn” some interpret the word in 1 Corinthians 7:9 as a reference to burning in hell. However, the context of the word in our passage is that of sexual matters. Therefore, it is in the sense of being inflamed or become aroused with sexual lust that the word is used in our passage of 1 Corinthians 7:9. The Greek used the present tense of our word. The implication of such usage is that it describes an action that happens so frequent that we can say that a person has become pre-occupied with sexual desire. It does not mean that a person in view is occupied non-stop with sex but that the person’s occupation with sex is so frequent that when the person is not occupied with something that engages the mind then the person’s mind becomes involved in sexual desires or imaginations. It is because of the frequency of such a desire that the Greek word implies being inflamed with sexual desire.
There is no doubt that as we have seen, it is beneficial to remain single but here the apostle indicates that it is better to be married than to be preoccupied with sexual lust. Why is it more beneficial to be married than to be inflamed with sexual desire? As we have alluded, it is because being inflamed with sexual desire does more harm to the spiritual life than being married. We noted that one advantage of being single is that such a person can devote more time to spiritual matters than those who are married but such an advantage is overshadowed by the fact that a person who is constantly thinking about sex is more likely not controlled by the Holy Spirit. In effect, a person who is constantly thinking of sex is more likely committing sexual sin in the person’s thought like what the Lord explained in His Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5:27–29:
27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.
A person who commits sexual sin in the mind because the individual is constantly thinking of sex or having sexual lust could not be a spiritual believer and so it is detrimental to that individual. So, despite the problems associated with marriage, it is better to be in it where there should be regular sexual relationship between the spouses to minimize the problem of sexual lust. The point is that although those in marriages have their distractions, but they could easily deal with their problems than for a single person could deal with constant pre-occupation with sex. It is for this reason that is better to be married than to be single with constant desire for sex. Of course, being married and being involved in regular sexual relationship make it difficult for Satan to tempt those who are married. Hence, being married would protect a person from giving Satan an opportunity to tempt one to sexual sin. For, it is because of this that the Holy Spirit through the Apostle advised young widows to marry as we read in 1 Timothy 5:14:
So I counsel younger widows to marry, to have children, to manage their homes and to give the enemy no opportunity for slander.
Anyway, the advice of the apostle to those who are single is for them to marry as one way to avoid pre-occupation with sex.
03/20/20